tribute

This is my 3rd post today already but I felt like it so here goes. It's a tribute to my silent pillar of support:

Thanks goofball, for leading without dominating, loving without demanding, caring without intruding and most of all for your presence in my life unwavering. You've held my hand without chaining and provided security in vulnerable moments. Even when we were just friends, you've put smiles on my face and dried my tears when I was at my weakest.
You were never the one that stood out among our friends, but you were always silently there. You were never the one who tried crazy stunts with me, but you would have been the one to catch me if I fell. You were never one of the charmers, but you were quietly alluring in your own way.

It's amazing now that I look back and see how far we've come in our friendship. You've loved me through all my transitions. You knew the girl in spectacles with her nose buried in a book, you knew the girl who hated school but loved CCA. You knew the wildly rebellious girl and now you know the happy optimistic girl. Time has now bridged the years between us and you've grown too, into a wonderful man I'm now proud to love.

Out of the blue, I decided to reminisce over my past entries when my brain cells decided to go on strike while I was doing math. It's amazing how frustrations melt away so quickly with joyous memories, leaving in its wake only laughter and smiles. It does seem like my purpose in creating this haven of memories has been fulfilled!

Joy right this moment is the joy of knowing that despite the storms I may have to weather, I'll make it through because I have so many memories to tide me over and the lovely people who created those memories by my side. Missim is a blessed girl!

Ok, this is for the benefit of you all. To prevent me from exploding at the next person who asks me to explain our status, here it is defined once and for all.

Sam and I agreed on this. We decided to commit but neither of us owns the other. We are not exclusively seeing each other and can explore other options should we wish to do so. In our case, it's not don't ask don't tell, it's full honesty and we respect each other's personal space. We just want to love without burden and be there for each other without obligation.

And of course, Joy today is goofball's voice, even though he's halfway round the world.

Yesterday, a very special smile made my day. Those little fingers that wound around my finger and the smile that followed. It really moved me. In the crowded confines of the MRT, that smile, so unburdened and so worry-free, went straight to my heart and warmed my insides. That baby's smile left me smiling the rest of the trip and I couldn't help but be amazed at the wonders of a child's trust in a complete stranger.

It left me pondering..When does it begin to wane so that we are rudely awakened to the marred beauty of this world? Why does it fade so many of us become creatures of suspicion, doubting and skeptical? Perhaps in a quest for success, driven by greed and thirst for comfort, we've neglected the beauty in simple moments of joy, momentous yet deeply profound. In a world surrounded by beauty and joy, we've chosen to focus on the small cracks and dents, allowing ourselves to sink into the depths of worry and stress.

Perhaps its time to reevaluate our lives and ponder our definitions of happiness, for happiness is more easily attained than thought to be and less mercenary than imagined.

Rachel is very very happy girl because she heard from Charlie!

Charlie, are you reading this?

Rachie wants Charlie to know that Rachie misses Charlie! Rachie wants to see Charlie! Rachie loves Charlie!

今日的快乐就是活在这一分，这一秒，享受它的快乐。无论是在哪里，在做什么，只要能体会快乐，我就是最幸福的人！身边有那么多爱我疼我的人，我是世上最快乐，最幸福的人！所以我想跟我身边的朋友说：谢谢你们让我欣赏快乐的美快乐的单纯。

Joy today comes from good memories, from inspirational people, from knowing that those around me love and believe in me.

Flipping the pages of my Val Book, the scribbles inside caught my eye. Just when I was beginning to get frustrated and annoyed, those simple heartfelt words from all my lovely girls drew tears to my eyes. It made me smile...

Great party at Nirun's. Joy today is catchin up w friends, chilling out, great food and vodka on the rocks. Oh and joy is successful baking too!

JJ's surprise celebrations

Joy is so simple when defined by company. Joy is so beautiful when it radiates from within and the happy vibes reaches those around me. I haven't felt so amazingly happy in a while.
I've just been Shokudoed and Loofed and I loved every minute of it. Planning the surprise party of two very lovely lovely girlfriends who I couldn't without has made my week and the actual play out of the plans went awesomely well.

JJ, I love you two and you deserve the best. Hope you girls had fun at today's surprise though it was nothing big. Plus it was an alcohol free night, so the high i got definitely spelled fun and joy. Pics will b loaded up soon i promise. Hearts hearts!

Joy today is browsing old photos and remembering those happy moments. It's seeing familiar faces and pondering those friendships. Those that have come and go yet remain a deep memory. Those who came into my life and are have still left traces in my life. And those who have stayed by my side since they came in and I simply couldn't do without. And I'm thankful for every single one of my friends.

I realise just how lucky I am, becoming a happier and happier person everyday. I have my stressed out moments yet sadness and dejection has become a memory. I'm lucky to be loved and have loved. I'm fortunate to be surrounded by people I can count on. I'm blessed with an innate passion which I can indulge in to forget all unhappiness. I can smile, I can laugh, I can love, I can live, that just about makes me the luckiest girl.

Perhaps my heart's no longer perfect, scarred and jagged with different pieces that don't quite fit together. But each of those scars taught me a lesson, each of those pieces represent e pieces given to me by my friends. It's as beautiful as it can get. I'm sick of bearing hatred. It doesn't matter what you've done because I'll forgive you. No matter how many times you may hurt me, I'll call you a friend. Until you walk away I won't. And if today I died, I'd die happy.

Joy is all around! Even when I'm sick, you bring me joy with your surprises. You make me smile and make me laugh. What would I do without good ol kor.