My my.. it's certainly been a while. Thank you for the reminder Sam.

Well, life is just great. How could it not be with the best love in the world from daddy God? He's answered prayers and mum's coming to church. I can't wait to see how her life will be changed!

And J, he's just such a dear, bringing me such joy. Cooking me egg porridge when I'm ill and driving my siblings. It's all the little things you do I appreciate. But even without them, I'll still love you!

Life in the newsroom is as dynamic as ever. Enjoyable yet draining. Tiring yet fufilling. Stressful yet thought provoking.. I just love it!

LORD, with you in my life, joy is everyday!
Dear, with you in my life, blessed i am everyday!

Joy is everywhere. At least since exams ended. A picnic in Regents Park last saturday reminded me of what a recluse I'd become over the exam month, shutting myself off and relegating my time spent in nature to a faraway place. Joy is in the beauty of the company, both new and familiar, easy banter and the chance encounter of a neighbour I'd never met before. Intriguing indeed. And more joyous company today in the form of brunch and househunting with Nat and my amazing cell group at Goodge.

But the greatest joy still comes from the promise of my LORD, that I am HIS, never to be forsaken. Knowing that even in troubled times as I submit all I have to HIM, I find peace in HIS presence. Knowing that as I lean on HIM, HE'll take me through it all.

There is none like you,
no one else can touch my heart like you do,
I could search for all eternity long and find,
there is none like you.

None like you LORD, no joy like the joy that comes from your spirit within...

Evem if J upsets me and makes me cry, I've come to know that having him is my biggest blessing. For him to tirelessly love me so patiently even when I'm hard and tiring to love. I've demanded attention, even when he couldn't give it, expected him to change knowing he's the way he is. But I've come to realise that I can hope for change as he grows but if change doesn't come I accept him no matter what. I fell in love with him and therefore choose to accept every part of him as I'm growing, learning each day and finding joy in learning how to love.

I'm sorry for my imperfections dear and my past demanding nature, forgive me as I learn to love you, selflessly and in HIS love.

Sometimes just when it seems like the world is a selfish place, I'm reminded by the love and care of a stranger. Staggering to the station feeling dizzy, a lady I barely knows kindly asks if I'm alright and offers to help me up the steps. A small gesture but it left me feeling loved. Such is the power of a stranger's love.

And the love of friends. Jin, a friend, a brother I couldn't do without. Even if it were just tears, somehow there's understanding. I feel truly blessed. BJ, I've barely known you and yet you've been so willing to share your experience and offer an ear and help. Thanks so much.

And the one love of the Father who is unwavering and steadfast, a love I can always depend and rely on.

Such are the joys of life.

what is giving?

What is the spirit of giving? That thought's been running through my head ever since we discussed it at cell. is it the giving we know of today, where we donate our spare cash to charity or the giving of gifts during festive season?

Reading about the early apostles and the early believing community in Acts provoked the thought that perhaps giving isn't just about giving what you can within your means. Perhaps it is as Sau Ling said, giving is about sacrifice, giving up something for the sake of others who need it more even if you need it. It is no wonder then that in today's rat race society, this mentality has been filtered out and replaced by the somewhat self-righteous nature of giving within our means. That is not to say that I've been a saint in that aspect since I've been doing just that but it does make me reevaluate the situation and wonder how can I give? Giving sure is harder than I thought. It's not just giving up that latest bag to buy someone a gift but as a friend shared, sacrificing possessions to help those in need. The early apostolic community wasn't perfect either, but it did reflect the believers as a community, that shone a beacon of light on those in darkness, yet not by words but by deeds. The actions that reflected genuine community spirit was able to draw others simply by the nature of its fellowship. Such is the importance of the body, where no one is of greater importance than the other and none can survive alone.

I realise there's really so much to learn from the older and wiser.
Abba Father, do enlighten me...

Love is waking up each morning,
knowing you're there for me.
Love is your tender touch,
even when I'm most unworthy.

Love is being able to cheer you up
when you're feeling down.
Love is that special bond
that makes the world go round.

Love is the smile on your face,
when I peck you on the cheek.
Love is you being by my side,
even when I'm sick.

Love may be bitter at times,
yet is always there.
Love is even those times you say
"I don't want to care".

Love is when you're there to catch me,
each time I feel like I'm falling.
Love is every time you tell me you love me,
especially after we're done squabbling.

Love is our melody,
a special dance we share.
Love is HIS gift to us,
a sign to show HIS care.

You know, things have been an emotional roller coaster lately but I've been reminded of one thing.

Love. The kind of love that just makes everything sweeter. The love that is reassuring, unconditional. The love like no other in this world. A love that transcends and a love that makes you feel so secure, knowing that there is no loss only surrender. A love from my Daddy up there who always has his eye on me, who loves me as his princess and calls me his precious. A love that gives me strength to discover the meaning of all other love.

Love. The kind of love that the closest friends share, the heart to hearts over a tub of Haagen Daz, knowing that if you woke them at 3am, they'd wake up to hear you cry, to offer that comforting presence. Being secure is never easy with the likes of today's media portraying ideals of life and looks, but having these people who you know would still love you even if you don't meet those standards. Them who will flatly tell you when you come out of the dressing room in something that highlights your lack of a waist that it looks awful. Those who will tell you you've got something in your teeth. Those you know will be truthful to you even if the truth hurts because you mean too much to them for them to lie.

Even though there are times where everything just gets to you and there's no time for anything, when things get tough and you just decide to throw every thing aside and dial that familiar number. Listening to HZ's voice on the phone again today just warmed my heart to no end. As though no time has lapsed between our last conversation, we break into excited chatter. Conferencing with Jin and HZ like the old times, somehow the world seems a whole lot brighter. My dearest di and mei, what would I do without you...

I have the LORD's joy despite my sickness. I learn to trust and to lean on HIM.

Daddy told me he loves me! Yay!

i choose to love you..

Oh I just realised this is my 101th happy post! Yay! So many things to be happy about! Anyway, I'm typing this while someone's finally gone to get some shuteye after trying desperately to stay awake to accompany me.

Thanks dear, your efforts are appreciated. I'm sorry for the times that I'm such a grumpy pig, especially recently when I'm sick. Just wanted to say I'm really thankful for your patience and still never cease to be amazed at the times you return my frustration and anger with gentleness.

There are times where you upset or annoy me and then innocently ask me why I'm angry. I'm never sure I have strength to stay mad at you, not knowing whether to laugh at your naivety or to cry at your lack of understanding.

And then I remember all the beautiful times that we spent doing quiet time together, the times on webcam where we just stare at each other, the times that you do things to make me laugh, the way you tell me bedtime stories to put me to sleep, and I realise you mean much more than a silly argument. Despite the distance, each morning I wake up, I find more and more reason to love you.

Through HIM, I learn your flaws and weaknesses, but HE gives me strength to endure. Many times I wonder why, but it seems HE knows me better than anyone else. HE has revealed much to you and even as I ask HIM to show me how, I ask HIM to teach me to love you in HIS image.
HE is our superglue, our daddy God, our protector. And because HE loves you, I love you. Because HE taught me to, I choose to love you.

a feast..

Resilience. Today I witnessed it amidst bone-chilling images that made my hair stand. As I sat there rooted, the word permeated my thoughts. His perserverance was admirable. His integrity amidst the corrupt natures of his surroundings even more so.

Yet I hadn't expected something this crude. Sure there was the whole violence label on the whole thing but I just wasn't prepared for the rude shock of the sights exposing the vile side of mankind. I winced at every gunshot, cringed at the horrendous torture and yet something drew me. My eyes transfixed on the scene before me, I didn't know what it was that captivated me so. And then I realised that it was the unmasked brutality so blatantly flaunting itself, the rawness of it all, that I didn't want to believe existed.

I was undeniably hooked. This wasn't just another hero gets girl story. It was far more. Stripped bare of its facades, the rawness of human nature exposed struck a chord. It was a portrait of life on the other side, the side that seems to have been neglected and shunned. It was a painting, a true depiction of survival. A fight just to stay alive, a quest to outrun others in the rat race. It wasn't just him. From the gang leaders to the children, it was the same for everyone. That stirred my thoughts. Even in this world now, isn't that a reality? Perhaps with greater civility in some places, but nevertheless isn't it the same?

Although the story unravelled to a somewhat predictable ending, the journey it took left a deep impression, leaving me choked with emotion. Thought-provoking, it made me begin to ponder life's journey yet again. This time, from a different viewpoint.

Brilliantly captured with every scene poignant and meaningful, SLUMDOG MILLIONARE was truly a work of art in my eyes. And that was joy today. To savour every moment of that film and to realise my blessings. Of course, not forgetting the company who convinced me to watch such an unforgettable film.