I could say last night was excruciatingly painful. Woke up in a cold sweat and a quick glance at my phone told me it was 2am. My abdomen hurt like hell, I felt my insides churning like a laundromat. Went to mum's room to get medicated oil to apply, and then the throwing up started. I must have spent my whole night with my head over the toilet since the sky went from dark to light without me even noticing. I'm feeling so much better now and my abdomen no longer feels like its about to split.

Despite the terrible night though, I feel loved. All through the torment, and in all my unglamness, I had goofball's company over the speaker phone. I could barely talk but i listened to him crack jokes attempting to cheer me up. When that didn't quite work, he decided to sing me lullabies and I wasn't sure how to react. On one hand I wanted to laugh at his silliness yet on the other hand I couldn't laugh out loud. All through my throwing up, he kept asking me if I felt better. Though I was white like a sheet and squirming in pain, his presence made it tolerable. It's moments like these where I feel loved and these I'll always remember. Sam may not be my dream lover, yet he's there when it counts and for that, I'm truly grateful.

I love how things are with us now, cause every little thing we do means much more and at least we know it's not out of obligation. I love you cause I want to. And right here and right now, I'm missing you from 209379266258940986130038645567043866424659796585 miles away, you silly goofball.